A new Match!

So last night I posted about how I've been failing at this email on the line dating thing. Tonght apparently match.com decided to pair me with a Broncos fan who asks;

"What ever happened to chivalry? I'm not into the whole damsel in distress thingy, but come one... No one has respect anymore! I'm not expecting every date to be like an episode on the bachelor."

Her profile pictures include mostly pictures of places around the world that she has been too and she is either an RN or a dental assistant as there is a pic of her in medical attire as if she is about to conduct surgery. Her profile also states she speaks 3 different languages. In putting this all together this is what I decided to email her. The only truth is that I really have been trying to make it out to Europe since I was 18...

Hi.

Hope you're doing well! Something on your profile caught my eye and I have a quick story to tell about it;

I couldn't help but notice the pics you have of Europe. Ever since I was 18 I dreamed of making the trip to Europe. A few years ago I finally got the chance. I was in Italy and walking along the sea after a few drinks when I felt really light headed and must have passed out. Hours later a fisherman found me floating in the Mediterranean. I felt two sharp pains in my back,  and I noticed that I had been given an account number for a bank in Zurich. I took the next flight there where I met a German national girl. For some reason she kept calling me Jason. When I tried to tell her my real name, I found myself suffering with a bout of amnesia. All the sudden we started being followed. In an act of chivalry I decided to defend us from these culprits. As fate would have it I found myself highly skilled and loaded with talent when it came to the martial arts. And somehow I also now spoke Spanish, and German, to go along with English. Anyways after countless car chases and country hopping through Europe, we made it to her step brother's house in the middle of France. Yet these hitmen were persistent and tracked us there. I decided in a final act of chivalry to send my new friend off with her step brother while I got to the bottom of what was going on. 

Anyways it turns out it was a silly case of mistaken identity and after a few weeks I remembered who I was. A few years later I was in Greece when I ran into my German lady friend. Alas something terrible happened to her but that's best told in a sequel to this email, lol.

finally I couldn't help but notice your attachment to an inferior NFL, team, when everyone knows that the San Diego Chargers are the greatest team of all time. How do I know? Why else would God have made the Sky Charger powder blue? Anyways, hope you have a fun friday night planned.

Moby- Extreme ways. hahaha come one you gotta know why by now.