De La me - Trouble In The Water

If you feel like being nostalgic I highly suggest listening to this song whenever you get to reading this. For me, it reminds me now of times with all my friends-not just when this song came out, but over the course of the last few years-even this last one in LA. Bigfoot, Baja, the whaler, excuse the drunken writing my SLF(figure it out) reminded me I hadnt written in a while and I decided to type this up after a night with her. christ, i have been having to go back and fix the spelling on this shit but i'm gonna stop. anyways back to what i was writing. Oh yeah what was I talking about-good times. I havent written lately because well i dont have a great place to write. my computer is set up on my bar counter in my apartment and seeing as I have yet to buy bar stools i have to type this standing up. why havent i bought furniture? because money to me is better spent on things like rent, my kids and going out with friends in Phoenix. that shit can be expensive.  But I'm typing away tonight standing up cuz its not fair for the three readers i have to be kept away from my spectacular stories.  Everyone by now i'm sure has ex's that they may prefer not to think about, but everyone has to admit that there were times that were great that were spent with them. if there wasnt then you must have not picked ex's really well. this is was one of those times. back in 99 the ex and i lived in Monterey and thought it would be a good idea to buy bikes to ride along the bay. its quite a spectacular view there. anyways we had bought bike and really the reason for this story is because i was thinking of what to buy my kids for christmas this year and had though of buying them bikes. Except I thought back to when the last time i had even gotten one one and rode it. and my mind, however messed up its been since my intake of alcohol since could only think back to 1999.which is i'm sure pretty sure anyways the last time i rode one. nowadays with my kids anyways, kids arent interested in bikes for christmas i think its because there is so much other cool shit they would rather have. We had gone to a mall in Salinas and bought bikes already made so we didnt have to put them together and decided to ride them that same day. They ended up sucking big time as they had gears and i was pedaling furiously only to be going slower than molasses and being passed by joggers along the bike path on the coast. I just remember on the way back to our apartment having to get off the bike because i could walk faster holding the bike than actually being on it. haha this story is not so spectacular, But I just remember the feeling of enjoying the day with someone you cared about walking along a nice stretch of scenery and taking it all in. Its not sadness but just hoping that one day my kids will want to hop on a bike and enjoy such a time. it also I guess makes me want to make sure that whoever i'm with and whoever you all are with will get to have a moment like this if you havent alreay had one. Im not a good enough writer to describe the feeling or set the scene majestically. I guess i'm just hoping any who read this have known a feeling like this- a time with people you can reflect on and say damn that was a good time, regardless of whether youre still in touch with the people you had that moment or not. really i just wanted to post this song up again if i hadnt already which im sure i have since its one of my all time favorite songs. I guess the hope is to keep having these times with the people you have now surrounding you. does this blog make sense? probaly not. oh well i'm tired of standing already and am hitting the hay.

G'night world.

Luckyiam - For You (ft. Aceyalone & Slug)

Thursday afternoon I get a text like this;

" happy hour and/or some flat out drinking tomorrow?"
"umm, of course"
a few minutes later;
"I actually feel like drinking tonight- damn!"
" I can do that too..."
"you in for that?"
" Is my name not Roy?"

Haha and so began the latest drink fest... a quick run down from all that I can remember...
thursday- Now Del had once told me a story about a girl who was born and raised from Iowa but went and lived in England for like a week or something and when she came back home she all the sudden had a british accent, that 10 years or something later she still has.

Guess who drunk roy ran into on Thursday? And guess who said this at one point in the night when he realized who he was talking too...
"OH! OH! YOURE THE FAKE BRITISH CHIC FROM IOWA WHO WENT TO ENGLAND ONCE AND CAME BACK WITH THE ACCENT!"
hahaha that did not go over well apparently. anyways so an older native looking lady starts playing pool by herself. So I decided to go ahead and bet her I could beat her. we played a best of three. I, if you still don't realize am great at everything- except tennis, cuz well tennis is lame. So I of course let her win the first game, destroy her the second game and let her take the lead in the last one. Then I calmly and very badassly set myself up beautifully and make a good 5 ball run. all I have is an easy shot to make the 8ball and win. But I decide to pull a Mr. Mom and lose on purpose, which she can totally tell and gives me shit for the rest of the night. this is important because I am pretty sure she roofied me, as I don't really  remember the rest of the night.

Friday
me;
"even after coffee I'm still a solid .10 I swear..."
Then I had to go to this hispanic women's conference downtown- which was cool and there were a lot of latin ladies that quite honestly were impressed by me. why? cuz I'm me. Handed out the business card, shook some hands, kissed some babies and it was time to head to the tilted kilt to resume what I have decided to term as a celebration of freedom.

"you're too tall to be mexican"
"Does this have enough white people for you Roy?"
" Youre such a white mexican"
haha this is the shit I'm getting for being taller than everyone else.
 So after the tilted kilt we met up with some more people at Humble Pie, proceeded to drink decide to go downtown again, hit up this place called Hanny's where some guy did a poor job of flushing down his bag of coke, found this spot called the Matador, where we apparently did not have the right amount of tattooes required to be patrons of this establishment, and ended up at this place called Copper Blues.Now copper blues has this Sasquatch type of drink called the Moscow Mule. Someone decided it would be a good idea to order me a couple of these, which apparently led to me not remembering much of the rest of the night- apologies to the married couple next to us, my bad, haha.
" What did he say? cuz I am a southpaw!"
" She should be serving me some Pho!"

Saturday;

 this conversation occurred

" Man, Roy, I'm not like you guys I don't do this normally... I mean I know it doesnt look like it but I'm a healthy guy- I eat broccolli, fruits, and grilled chicken and stuff... maybe we should just take it easy today since we are gonna go at it sunday for football again..."
"youre the one that made plans to watch UFC tonight- plus whats the point of of not drinking tonight? I mean we know whats gonna happen sunday anyways... plus we are helping him through this rough time, haha"
" you're right..."
So then this guy proceeds to have us do shots of jaeger all night- We would pick a fighter and if he lost we would have to do a shot... I'm not very good at this game...
Back to Zipps we went....
"You know I am Herpes free! although I must admit I have battled chlamydia..."
" Did I mention I am Herpes free? and I can cook?"
" I am smart as fuck and am clap free!"

hahaha somehow these lines dont get the ladies...

Sunday morning after we locate our vehicles and re form like voltron again...

" Next time you break up with your girlfriend, dont call me!"


"Actually Roy its your fault, if you had gone out on a date, I wouldnt have been here, he wouldnt have had anybody to hang out with, maybe he wouldnt have gone  So I blame you..."

" I thought you were smart roy but then you said Columbus was portugese..."

" I just said he wasnt spaniard guy..."


This is what happens when 3 cool guys run amok in Phoenix. excellent weekend.

" We need rules and regulations! I cant drink over 200 ozs AND eat- I just cant! we need to set boundaries! eating mexican after these outings must go! No dennys either- I'm trying to watch my figure!"

my plea fell on deaf ears so now I must go to the gym and hike squaw peak.

Slug, Acey, and lucky, for you.

cuz she's changing the way September tastes...

Phonte - The Good Fight [prod. 9th Wonder]

Take a moment to read the title of this blog "Phonte- the good fight PRODUCED BY 9TH WONDER. When I first saw this it brought a smile to my face. Then I heard the track and it brought a tear to my eye. See they had broken up as the group called Little Brother and at times they had lashed out at each online with regards to the break up, I thought they may never work together again. I'm not even sure if they settled all their differences but friendship can and should withstand the tribulations of business or a work environment- if you are a true friend anyways. and so bam, they come out with this track. I didnt even need to see the liner notes to know. Anyways its a shame if you dont give this track a listen- seriously this goes beyond the usual "my music is better than yours" b.s. I preach...Legendary Adult Contemporary Hip Hop right here.  About a week after a friend hit me up with this album and its still all I'm listening to. Its been a solid couple of years that an album has done that. I got excited like a little kid at christmas and decided to share the link with some people.

A couple of weeks ago I went to a friends birthday party out here at an Irish Pub. Other than Issam, Del and Brandy I really didnt know anybody. But I'm me and you obviously have first hand knowledge of my greatness. So after everyone I actually knew left, I ended up hangin out with a couple of new people. Now the plan was to go only four rounds of jameson and pints. That number doubled and I had a fuzzy recollection of how I got home. I knew I had taken a cab with the people I had met up, and knowing me figured I may have said somethings to offend (you guys obviously know this about me too, haha) But having just met them I had no way to contact them to verify. So I shoot Mike a text asking if he had been in the cab and after he replied that he hadnt,I had to ask if he knew if/how badly I had offended his friends in the cab. I then just left it at that, and figured if something bad had transpired I would hear about it. But this last friday I meet up with everybody at some other local spot and bam the people I had taken a cab are there... I walk in and they immediately start laughing. One of the girls is from Nigeria, and I had apparently dubbed her team Africa, the cab driver I dubbed John Lennon, and I basically had made the cab ride home the highlight of the night. I of course had the Cab driver drive thru a mexican food place (and later a jack in the box, haha), but I also has to take a leak so I hop out of the cab and have this exchange with the cab driver;


" Alright John, I'm gonna go take a piss by that tree but you know what to tell them..."
" Um what should I be telling them?"
I give him a serious look and grab him by the shoulder to let him know of my seriousness I guess...
" Tell them that I went to take a piss and that you're Jesus Christ."
and apparently I just start dying laughing as I go take a piss and everyone in the cab is dying of laughter.

I guess another cab passenger was from North Korea...
" Oh you're from NORTH korea? I'll try not to piss you off so you don't blow us up..."
and after every ridiculous statement I made in the cab, I guess I would follow up with
"AM I Wrong! or Am I wrong!"
which on friday became the catch phrase for everyone... I'm a trendsetter out here. Met up with Ruben (the guy who let me know of this epic cab ride, which I guess was over an hour long), good solid guy. He let me know that it felt good to laugh so hard after such a shitty week at work. Thats what the weekends are for.

Friday night another buddy ended up having to crash at my apt and after I got back to my apartment saturday morning from opening up the office for the contractors, was already awake and states to me;

" Man I woke up not knowing where I was, without a car, and my phone is dead..."

"haha man thats been my typical weekend morning since I moved to phoenix..."

Saturday I hit up Chandler for the first time to go to this octoberfest, but had to wake up at 6am to get back to the office to let some other contractors in at the office. Met up with some more new cool people while they were being hounded by some not so lovely cougars.
" Roy your mission right now if you choose to accept it,  is to disengage us from these women..."
was the first thing said to me after our introductions.
"Roy whats the first thing that comes to mind if I introduce myself as Everado?"
" unicorns frolicking in a desert landscape with rainbows shooting out?"
which I believe I also put on one of the postcards I mailed out a couple of weeks ago- I still cant believe there are no unicorns in Arizona...

True to form, I woke up at Issam's this morning and got droppped off at Zipps where my car was. My phone is still alive though. Another excellent Arizona weekend. Enjoy your Monday.

Molemen ft. Brother Ali - Life Sentence

Really quick before going back to the regularly scheduled program- just have to write this part up for me feel free to skip a paragraph or so if I so choose to use paragraphs...

I am taking the fact that my boss will call me at 9:30 at night to ask me questions as a good sign of him knowing I know my shit- sure its late, and lucky for me I have learned not to drink the normal roy ridiculous amount or at all actually during the week to handle these calls. Its like I'm currently on call all the time so I know better, plus while I have in the past knocked back a few and still went to the gym, played basketball, gone hiking, etc... its obviously less work to do at the gym if I havent. So here I am getting ready to watch me some Tosh.O when the phone rings last night. Damn it. alright. For those that don't know, last week I was working on obtaining information and setting up our company's compliance reports-talking hot action insurance shit here guys, haha- but on one of them I sent out a distress signal since I had no clue about it.

Alright sorry about that- I know what I wrote in my last blog but I had to spill that out plus I find it amusing so should you...

Last weekend was a good one; Friday was low key which was perfect because after painting a 1600 square foot building, Saturday was ridiculous. Headed to the Tilted Kilt to watch the Ortiz v Mayweather  fight... One last word here on that really quick so as to try to not upset the mayweather fan base- What Ortiz did was retarded and illegal, what Mayweather did was Lame but Legal. No getting around that. Mayweather could have easily won the fight without doing that. I just don't think you all would be yelling the protect yourself at all times theory if Mayweather (you're gonna respond with Mayweather would never not protect himself, blah blah blah) had been knocked out like that-please don't act like you would have. I know I would be saying the same thing if that had happened- that thats not a way to win a championship...

After the fight however, the night kept going- I of course have started talking about how awesome I am again, well because its true. That part had gone missing for a while I know, because well part of that comes from my productivity in my career


" You really do think you're awesome."
" Well put it this way; God is here. (hand motion for added effect) I'm up here..."

The only blemish on this weekend was the Charger loss, which I don't handle well.

"I'm not gonna lie Del don't know if we can come back from that half time deficit..."
"I'm not gonna lie Del don't know if there is a greater quaterback than Phillip Rivers..."
"I'm not gonna lie Del don't know if there is a better receiver than Vincent Jackson..."
haha that was about 3 of the 1000 or so statements I started of with "I'm not gonna lie Del..."

After the loss I only had my bud light shirt I had gotten for free and a couple of H n Rs to console me. This week's game doesnt matter much because they play the lowly chiefs. I'm tired of basic wins I want glorious ones against teams like the Patriots, playoff games and superbowl wins...

On another front I'm going to a meeting today and I don't know what to expect, but if nothing else it should be entertaining I guess or so I hear. Shit maybe I will learn something...

Enjoy the rest of your week- VP of claims just called and I need to go pick up some razors to clean up the windows, telling you all this shit is really from the ground up literally...

The Ecology

Over the last few weeks, I have been a man of many trades; plumber, floorer, painter, marketing genius, underwriter, security guard, project manager... etc. I have climbed peaks, ascended mountains,  been a jet setter, hiked the arid arizona desert, outwitted mvds, held my own with men of law,  had my way with stripper quality talent, discovered a fantastic cab secret, come to terms with feelings most of which deal with the fact that without a grill I have no love for cooking, and other more distant ones, eaten cereal for dinner on a few occasions, and have only drank 1 beer(well at my apartment at least). But most importantly, is that its been more than 2 weeks since I have dipped. Dont get me wrong, after tonights meal I instantly thought about putting  some in and enjoying, but then I realized how long it had been and that I'm currently out. And the thought faded. One bad habit at a time I say.

I get my first official check tomorrow as the greatest underwriting manager that ever graced this green pasture called earth, and I must say that I have fully earned it. Especially today-christ it took me a few reads to figure out what the hell I needed to be reporting to the good ol' federal government and only a few moments afterward to realize I needed to hire someone from the outside to do it for me.

But this blog is supposed to be about my glorious drinking ability or my failing attempts to stop for awhile, or about my lament of not having a job, or about silly dreams,  or ridiculous verses,  and not boring you all with lame stories of an actual job. you all have your own, obviously more boring, and presumably more dead end, jobs than mine, so why go into the details of that? I mean I write this so you can escape your work day for a bit and imagine how awesome life would be as me or how thankful you are that you're not me (but lets be honest more of the former than the latter). And honestly it would come off as me showing off and if you really really know me, you know I hate to be in the spotlight-which is different that not wanting to be in your every waking thoughts. No, you all should always be thinking, talking, and hoping to hang out with me- but I dont want to be the center of the conversation when I'm around. When I'm around you all should just sit back and enjoy the presence that is me. The people of phoenix I'm sure rejoice in the fact that they now have the opportunity for that to occur daily, mostly on weekends. San Diegans and Los angelenos your time will come soon again although at this point I'm not sure when so until then take comfort in my hand written prose that is mailed via the greatest postal service this world has ever seen- if only because it handles my mail of course.

So I guess I'm trying to bring this blog back full circle-yeah it diverted to standard boring drivel at times, but you know what? I kind of blame it on you. In the beginning it tended to be about outings with you all, which were epic, and all of the sudden some of you got all responsible and shit. which left this blog with not much to report on. I'm not saying go streaking wearing your bras on your head (although I'm not saying not to-some of you all I wouldnt mind seeing like that), but christ, rage against the dying of the light! Start hanging out again instead of being lame-os Alright fine some of you are now higher ups and some of you have become parents. That leaves me to fend for myself again and report on my outings. Which really take awhile because I have to ask;
1. what happened?
2. did/who did I offend?
3. In what way should I apologize?
3. how did I get home?
4. where is my car?
5. what did that guy say about pheremones?

(I have two #3 because I really wanted to have only 5 questions and hope the visual fools you.)

I seriously need to just finally go through Brian's idea and have a camera crew following me around. Save me the effort and the typing.

I leave you with this trivia question about me that really should be on Jeopardy but it will have to suffice for here;
Name the first 3 things that I placed in my fridge. One will throw you off as you'd ask yourself how the hell its made.
Double jeopardy points if you know the brands.


Fashawn- The Ecology- another less than 3 minute banger that should be longer. No you've never heard of him, yes you should like him, if you don't I don't know go back to bitching about t.i. and lil wayne and how there is no good rap even though I've been slapping you in the face with it for over a year now.

Nasty Filthy

Really quick I forgot to mention the other day that I have already alienated my neighbor with my urban music. I came home the other day and did the usual- turned on the itunes and played some music. Not loud mind you because I know better than to start off on the wrong foot with my new neighbors. Turns out it was still too loud for my neighbor and she came over, complained about the base and before I even got a chance to introduce myself, she turned around and walked away. Very bitchy like.

conversation from yesterday;
Marketing manager to me;

" you know why Vic is starting up this insurance company? Like his sole motivation for doing it seriously? Because you know he already has enough money to live comfortably..."

" No, why?"

"Because he wants to own an NFL team."

Vic interrupts;
" Not just any NFL team- I want to buy the Chargers."
I start smiling, because he is dead serious. My reply?
" Well hell as long as you keep them in San Diego or bring them back to San Diego by the time you buy them, I'll be ok with that"
"Deal. And every home game all of us are gonna be BBQing on the field. Why? cause I'll be the owner and I'll do whatever I want. TV shots of us eating and doing shots..."

Oh if and I asked for your address, you have just been enrolled in one of the greatest Multi Level Marketing schemes ever! just make your checks payable to me when you get the bill, and I'll take care of the rest. Easy money. I promise. Haha just kidding. I am trying to keep the USPS from defaulting- hope you enjoy them.

I Don't Know

Really quick before I finally start unpacking; Job wise, I am seeing exactly how much responsibility I have with this new company, and I'm actually handling it ok so far. Its not like my first assignment as a trainer at Geico when I had to train all the new supervisors from Tucson on State Regs and underwriting procedures. I was scared shitless. So much so that an hour before I was to start the training session, you could find me in a bathroom stall trying to handle a mini panic attack. I was only 25 at the time about to train supervisors who were older and more experienced in insurance than me. It took a few texts from my friend Amanda, it went something like this;
" where are you?"
" just in the bathroom freaking out- hows your day going?"
" listen stop being a dweeb- we talked about this last night. you'll see these morons don't know half of what you do"
" yeah well dont know about that"
"dont make me go into the men's bathroom to get you! Having to deal with the women's bathroom is bad enough- I can only imagine the horrors of your bathrooms..."
She ended up not having to.8 years later its good to know that I'm far removed from wanting to go hide in the bathroom (plus its not even finished in the new building yet, haha). I ended up coming out a little bit after that and handled business (please see previous blogs where I explain how I am the Michael Jordan of auto ins underwriting- really there is no one even Scottie Pippen close). Even so, I always want to learn more about my industry. Friday, I sat in with our claims consultant to go over the claims process in AZ. My boss liked the fact I sat in even though its not my department- I told him I needed to know every aspect of claims and sales since my department is going to be handling issues from both of them.
In speaking with my owners (and going out with them on Friday night- good times and I behaved myself- I limited my drinks, although in thinking about it, the drinks I did consume were still more than the average person, hmm I wonder what they thought. haha They paid for everything, dinner, drinks, the entertainment hahaha, The entertainment! I can't go into details on that but let me just say they know how to have a good time.) I am finding out these are overall good guys- the business decisions we are going to have to make are pure business decisions; not personal ones. Friday one of the owners was flying back from a quick meeting in Missouri. He was  seated in first class when a couple of injured army guys were walking back heading to coach. He decided to switch seats with one of them and convinced the person sitting next to him to give up his seat to the other soldier. Turns out they had been injured in Afghanistan and were heading home to Phoenix. Yeah not a major thing, but still thoughtful and give some insight into the type of guy he is. The other owner used to also own a cold stone creamery and his manager would hate it when he came in. Not cuz he was an asshole but because every time he came in he would fuck up the inventory number by handing out free ice cream to all the little kids that walked in. So so far,  everything points to this being a really great opportunity with some good people. Again some decisions they make are gonna be tough to take because I am very consumer oriented, but at least I know its stemming purely from a business side.

What else? hmm. and yes I am delaying unpacking, even though its not much. Oh yeah this morning, I went shooting for the first time. Shot a Shotgun and a AR-15 for the first time. Although I had to admit to Del and Issam that it was a little disconcerting being around so many people with guns. Could just imagine someone deciding to go ape shit and try to shoot up everybody there. Need to see if an AR-15 is in call of duty so I can tell Lil D I shot it. I wasnt going to, but they were insistent and Clint's assertion that the gun doesnt bite got me to step up. After a quick tutorial on the rifle, I was aiming at a target and squeezing on a trigger. It was cool but you wont see me heading to the gun shop to buy a weapon anytime soon or ever. The shotgun course was more sporty and fun; we were shooting at those clay things- reminded me of duck hunt. I did ok on that I guess; hit a few of them...

 I Don't Know by Input- you've never heard of him. I hadn't until yesterday; I love just checking out random unknowns music to check them out. All the bullshit about drinking and the lameness that was 2010 that I tried to write, he did it on this track. Firms my belief that everyone has one good song in them.

"feel free to condemn my actions openly, I figure by this afternoon you'll easily be over me..."

"I would like to thank the people close to me for understanding the definition of lost and the synonyms for damaged; I would like to thank myself for all my problems tip another glass and let the alcoholic solve them..."

Enjoy the rest of your Labor Day weekend! if I could I'd be enjoying it with you.

Don't ever fuckin question that.

Now I know through maybe some of my Facebook interactions, texts, phone calls, etc... it may seem like I just spent my first week in Arizona in a drunken stupor. But other than thursday night I was mostly just in a heat stroke stupor. I decided I was gonna force myself to get adjusted to this heat by being out in it. While I handled it better than I thought I would, I did notice than in less than five minutes in this weather, you start to sweat your balls off. Big kudos to those of you that grew up in the desert cuz this shit is almost unsuitable for human life to live in. But  Actually this first week was very productive, I found an apartment, moved my stuff in, got my license, changed my address with the post office, got my car repaired, became a VIP at Frys grocery, got my Basha's membership card, got my electricity set up, found a spot with free wifi next door to me (Aunt Chiladas- which quite honestly is gonna become a second home, since I live only a 15 yard out from rivers to gates), and selected this years fantasy championship team.

Oh, and I climbed a fuckin mountain to boot. Go ahead and enjoy those pictures, since for most of you, it will be the only time you see something from the top of a 12,000 ft mountain. More on that later but I will just share this real quick; as I'm walking back and get to the saddle (the staging area for the final ascent to the mountain top), Issam is there waiting for me ( I rolled my ankle again- more on this also later) and states;
" I told the rest of the group i would wait for you because I told them I omittted something about this hike"
Me; "huh?"
Which was really the only thing i could say at the time because It was all my oxygen depleted body could muster.
" I may have purposely forgotten to let you know this is the hardest hike in all of Arizona..."
Now if I would have failed I might have been upset; but since I was able to reach the peak-albeit in a very pedestrian 4 hours, and I also had rolled my ankle at about the 3 hour mark- it was actually a nice accomplishment type of feeling knowing I had not only hiked at an elevation I had never even come remotely to being at- Hey Hugo what elevation are the Cuyamaca mountains at? I ask Hugo cuz he's Senor Geography and should know this shit- I finished it with a busted ankle....

Squaw Peak Apartments are the name of my new residence. I had mentioned these in a previous post that I would like to move in here, but with the way things go in my life I didnt really expect to be moving there. I'm not a pessismist; on the contrary I believe I am too Optimistic at times; get overly excited from any little thing that I consider a positive and end up day dreaming from the possibilities. This is why I like riding the ellipitical on most days or go for a long ass hike- I get to do nothing but enjoy the music I listen to and expand on these days dreams. Why? because they turn into goals. Some maybe completely unrealistic but that small bit of hope is really all I need to continue with my day. Anyways back to these apartments- its really cool for me that I got into them without any issue credit wise (see previous posts as to why I thought this would have been an issue) there has been only been a few times in my life where something I wanted to happen actually did; one for instance was back when I first moved to Monterey in 1999. I decided I wasnt gonna work anywhere else but the Wherehouse, and as unrealistic as it was to only apply to one place and expect to be hired there, it happened. Things like that just don't usually pan out for me, no matter how hard I try, how much I care, how awesome I am... so that this occurred, well it made me feel like I was back in Monterey a little bit-young, optismistic about the future, believing I still have time to achieve everything I want to achieve in life, personally and in the business world. Childish? Maybe. Whatever. I'm here in Phoenix to help my kids get to college and achieve my one goal for them; to learn from every mistake I have made so they dont have to go through it themselves- no matter how fucked up the country maybe by the time they go out on their own. I sometimes may not act like it, or bring my kids up enough, or whatever some of you need to see to really believe this, but this is seriously my #1 objective. I may have set backs, I may fuck up, I may get stuck up in bullshit, but in the bottom of my heart, this is how I feel. So as the title of this one suggest, just don't. So if in the end that is all accomplished, then I'm completely fine with that as well.

Back to the hike; I had been told round trip the hike was a total of 8 miles; so I figured to the peak was 4 miles. its not too steep in the beginning but you are going up hill constantly the whole time; so I was perfectly content when I reached the saddle (3.75 miles) at a pace of 27 minutes per mile. I figure about ten minutes slower than a usual walking mile for me but I was in altitude and it was uphill. It turns out that a) its more than 8 miles, b) the last part is filled with a few false peaks which completely demoralize you when you get to the top and realize you're not there yet, c) tubes are not the best choice of shoes for this type of ascent- I was not fucking in. I was fucking out, of breath... I don't drink while hiking, which everyone and their mom points out is a no, no, or no, no, no if you work at cable one, but I hydrate before I start these things and figure like a camel, the fat I have stored will power me the rest of the way. Well, everyone there has a camelback or is walking with water bottles, and I was forced to appease the group I was walking with to carry a half gallon of water, which totally harshes my gig while hiking. so during the last part of this hike, I said fuck it and left the water, unopened on a rock. Thought if I will need water it will be on the way down. Its not a macho hispanic thing or anything, its just that I have tried the hike and drink thing before and my body doesnt deal with that well, it thinks at the first drink of water that my hiking is through and begins to request beer. No but seriously, it just doesnt work for me- I rather drink 70 to 80 oz of water before hand and then go on about the business. Anyways, since hiking up this thing without water is rare, as I was hiking up, about ever 10th person would ask me if I wanted water;
" no thank you, I just would like some real air to breath cuz this air sucks..."
" thanks, but i'm good on water; just cursing my friends who thought it was a good idea to have a guy who just moved from LA and sea level, and take him on this hike."
So I'm tired out of breath but good on hydration. There is this couple who is walking right behind me and we have talked a little, when I go to step down from a rock on the trail to what looked like stable rocks. They weren't. One gave way into a hole and bam! Same ankle that had just healed, Rolled. I cuss everyone in the world personally by name, and the guy comes to help me out. While the guy is helping me to this rock off the trail to sit, his lady friend comes over and asks,
" Would you like some water?"
Now I had been asked this question a few too many times at this point, because while I am wretching in pain, I yell;
" NO I JUST NEED A FUCKING MOMENT!"
having exhausted all my available oxygen to yell I could barely whisper;
"but thanks though..."
which I dont think she heard. Sorry about that, I honestly really appreciated the gesture, but I was too busy wondering why god hates my ankle so much. Anyways I made it to the top took some pictures and headed back down; rolled ankle and all. Yeah, I'm a certified bad ass. Oh and on the way down I did find the water and I did drink it. just thought I clear that up.

After that a few of us guys went camping, Del who wisely skipped the hike showed up for the camp out as well. I had no signal at all for my phone- which I have to thank sprint for. Because camping isnt about playing words with  friends, facebooking, or drunk texting people. its about grilling up hamburgers over a camp fire, making dorito tacos out of kraft sliced cheese, drinking beers and shootig the shit till 3 am (well just Del and me; everyone else was out by 1030 because they were tired from the hike- refer back to my I'm a certified bad ass statement for being the only one to come back from the hike and still being out till 3.), taking 5 minute showers for 3 bucks, and talking about guns, or my phobia of them. It pretty much boils down to the fact that I have it ingrained in me that if I held a gun I would shoot off a body part or accidently shoot someone, So I prefer just to avoid holding one altogether.

Anyways this song came on Saturday while hiking and since I was close to death, I decided to come up with a list of things I loved in order. So in case I dont survive another one of these hikes, here they are;
1. my kids
2. sex
3. hip hop music
4. you (the reader friend; to future special lady friend- j/k you are so #2.)
5. san diego sports
(to future ex special lady friends, you never did go up pass number 5 which is probably why things didnt work out; no like lost though, enjoy your life)

Well its Monday week two; on Saturday my boss called and needs some actual work done so I'm off to start on that. enjoy your week if this is your last stop here till then.

Ghetto Dreams

So today was my first official day as a phoenixian, which is my preferred choice of term for someone who resides in this town. The plan was to work on rating issues my new company has, stop by the office see how the build out was going, then head off to check some apartments out and gym. Didn't exactly pan out that way. The morning work was done, and I did stop by the office. I was debating to either show up in my usual attire (shorts, hiphop shirt, flip flops) or deal with the heat and wear pants and a collared shirt. I met myself halfway and decided to wear jeans with a collared shirt. I show up and see one of the owners in basketball shorts, nike shirt and hat, trying to pick away at some concrete. Turns out the owner wasnt joking when he said we would be building out the building.
I knew at this point I wouldnt just be hangin for a bit and then going about my day so I head to my car, where I still had most of my clothes packed, and throw on some shorts and the vlade shirt. The vlade shirt is important because it turns out one of the owners is a die hard Laker fan; so much he is disillusioned and thinks Kobe is better than Michael Jordan. To sum up quickly,  this means some ridiculous laker seats for me when I'm in town next season-whenever there is a next season- and for whoever is cool enough to hang out. He has decided that part of the parking lot will be turned into a basketball court, where he wants us to play after work. I let him know up front I wouldnt be pulling a mr. mom and let him win. I also let him know I was looking for a rec league to play in and he wants to play with me once I find one. So yeah him and me will be getting along just fine... The claims VP is a bulls fan fyi and so he wont be getting any tickets, haha.

Anyways, back to this build out. While I'm there, I was asked if I was handy. my reply was that there was a reason I was an underwriter and not out there building skyscrapers. Didn't seem to deter them from handing me a pair of gloves and pretty much layed it out I would be working. Cool, fine I'll move some boxes or some shit, haha, nope. Turns out there was some concrete foundation that needed to be jack hammered so a pipe could be layed. Except you see, only one of the guys that was there is really knowledgeable when it comes to construction. The jack hammer was brought in, and I watched as one of the owners, and the claims vp are having trouble keeping the drill bit from staying on the jack hammer. I see the issue and tell them while I'm no Bob the Builder (yes I did make that reference),  a certain part needs to be pushed down so that the drill bit stays. They ignore my initial input. I decide I need to just take the jack hammer and show them. I lower the part i was referring to and viola! I was obviously right. I mean we are talking about me and I am the smartest motherfucker you know. Like it or not its the truth. Ha but still, if I am the one figuring tools out that no one else can, well thats not a good sign for the construction project... Anyways, since I figured it out they decide I should just be the one to jack hammer the concrete. Now I dont know if you have ever operated a jack hammer, but its heavy, constantly has you vibrating and shaking, and really is loud. The jokes were constant as we ended up all taking turns working with it. The claims VP and one of the owners even wanted their picture taken as they were using it, I guess to verify to people they could handle such equipment. Anyways about the jokes; Just use your imagination a bit (if you have one) and realize the types of jokes. We also joked we were gonna quit insurance and start up a construction company instead... At the end of the day when we realized all we had done was make a hole in the ground,  we were discussing the fact whether it wasnt just better to have real construction workers come in and take over. Everyone there except for the Claims guy and me speaks Armenian, so another thing they  keep joking about is  that we need to purchase the Rosetta stone to learn what they are saying. The only thing I can get is that they are discussing about the lack of advancement we had in the build out process today; I figured that this should had been expected, seeing as none of us really know what we're doing except for one of the owner's friends. Guys, if sweet baby jesus wanted us to do construction, he would of given us the skill to use tools.  Ha and for all you gout fans, turns out the claims guy suffers from gout too and was trying to explain to one of the owners how painful it is and how one gets gout. The owner was not convinced, and flat out blamed the claims vp's weight as to the reason his ankle is in pain.. The owner was also the one who went and got all of us lunch. Everyone had agreed and wanted Sonic Burger since most of them had never had it. Everyone ordered a burger except for me. I asked Jerry if he could get me the chicken sandwich... That made him decide that everyone should have a chicken sandwich to be more healthy, and that instead of Sonic we should have Carl's jr., since he knows their chicken sandwiches are good. When he returned with that and announced he had made an executive decision, you could see rage in a couple of the guys' faces. I just laughed as Jerry kept talking up Carl Jrs. as if no one had ever eaten carls before and as if it was more than a just fast food place. The claims guy and me later  decide to call it a day and as we're heading out, he asks me if I drive a benz or bmw too- ha! I laughed and let him know I rock a galant with bad paint and cut out door panels. I then realized who owned the only other average vehicle in the parking lot. See the parking lot had  a brand new rover, a BMW 7 series, brand new hybrid Cadillac Escalade, and a Lexus. The only other cars there were my piece of shit and a Chevy truck. He seems to think I rock a galant out of choice, not realizing my ass wants to eventually get into an Acura TL...  Anyways, I'm calling it a night, my attempt at being Manny the Handy man has left me tired and given my precious delicates hands blisters.


Common and Nas- Ghetto Dreams; making Kanye and Jay-z really have to watch the throne with this one...

Beautiful Morning

Top of the morning to you! Me being up this early in the morning is a combination of a visit to the big foot last night,(where I introduced Carlos to the Sasquatch) which had me calling it a night early, the excitement of this afternoon's RTB cuz I am a hip hop dweeb, and the fact that recently, once i wake up, my mind goes nuts thinking of scenarios what with my upcoming redirection of my life. I also constantly think of something else, but that has no place for this blog here this morning...

What happened to me not drinking? Nothing, I went 9- 10 days without drinking, really never seriously considering or thinking about having a drink. It actually felt pretty good knowing I'm not to the leaving Las Vegas stage. Just with the recent events, of landing the job I coveted, and leaving a job that was daily increasing my anxiety, it was ok to celebrate with a pint or 2. Well, in Indio it was more than a pint, throw in some margaritas, crown, hot ass shots of tequila that were forced upon me by Carina's friend Kenisha, and the end result was me taking a spill and hurting the elbow. Overall though its been a really long ass time where I have woken up and needed to ask if I offended anyone-and that's been going on for most of my stay in LA. haha, Well except last weekend in Indio, but Wes quickly let me no, that it was a good time. Anyways, 10 days is a good start, i know i can build upon that and I will-in Phoenix. Gotta hop on the gym full time like last year around this time too- the move to phoenix excites me in this way of being able to concentrate fully on job and me. And having my own place again. Sure in the beginning my place will consist of nothing but a bed and computer, but I'll eventually graduate to having furniture like a normal household... Ooh and if everything pans out for me, I'll be residing close to the peak that started my hiking career-squaw peak. Teach that motherfucker a lesson for almost giving me a heart attack trying to climb it last year.

The scenario thoughts that go through my head once i wake up are really my mind just switching from excitement to heading to phoenix, to complete self doubt about if I am going in over my head with this position. I know its exactly the same position i was doing at anchor, but there's some asshole in my brain that likes to envision complete doom and failure. This guy meets up with the god complex having dude in my head and they go at it for a few hours until i decide its time to get out of bed and make some coffee. Usually god wins out. I think its actually kind of good to have some self doubt, for me it keeps me motivated to make sure i learn more and be able to justify my ideas. It also keeps you from looking like a cocky asshole or bitch. Anyways this morning I decided to give them the day off and write some bullshit up in here...

Yesterday I walked into my last day of work at the auto club hoping to just slide in and out without much fan fare. I walked into a banner that said "good luck roy!" Haha, the exact opposite of what i was hoping. But it was really appreciated- I worked with some good people during my time there and I wanna thank them again for the BBQ lunch they got for my last day there.  The exit interview I had however, haha pretty much laid it out to them why the morale is what it is, and just threw my two cents in as to how to maybe turn it around. I mentioned this to Puya I think last night, but the best was when she asked me- after I had stated one of the reasons i was leaving was salary- she asked;
" so what percentage of an increase salary wise did you get? 5, 10, 20, percent more?"
"Um... like 100 percent more..."
she made this gasp/choke sound as I kind of laughed. I debated not saying, but I couldnt help myself.

Well, Phil should be on his way up to LA this morning so we can go to rock the bells- It was initially gonna be 8 going, then that turned to 6, then to 4... oh well, Phil and me will represent. This will probably be my last Rock the Bells unless they get there set time scheduling act together and/or come up with an incredible lineup like a couple of years ago. anyways this is an ok event to replace the fact I wont be making the atmosphere show at the greek next friday- a show I seriously wish for anyone that claims they like going to shows would check out.  Phil also wants to hit up Roscoes Chicken and Waffles so thats where the two's adventures will start today...

Again I probably used this song before, maybe not though. anyways LBs. I was gonna go with the Karate Kid by Sean P, but you all aint ready for that Random Axe gem yet. Sean Price right now is holding the top spot on my list right now...

anyways enjoy your weekend, hope to see some of you tomorrow, phoenix on monday...

Always Coming Back Home To You

So the majority of you know by now that my time in LA is coming to an end. It was a brief 8 months here filled with good times, more struggles, more failures, more setbacks, but most of all, more experiences. In the end, I guess I got what I initially thought was the reason I made this move in the first place; a job specific to my very narrow skill of auto insurance underwriting. Sure its gonna take place in Phoenix, but had I not moved up here, this opportunity wouldn't have presented itself. I say that this is what I originally thought I came up here for- I had convinced myself this was the sole reason to move up here, to join the auto club kick ass there and move up- but as the months passed I found that that really wasn't the only reason. I'll just say it was a mixture of escapism and unrealistic expectation.

I just got back from San Diego yesterday and have up until now called it home. I guess in a sense it will always be home- it was where I was born and raised- but  unlike most people that go home, I have nothing really to go home to. Yeah my kids are there but its well established now that they have their own home, with my ex. Its not my home. I have family and friends I love there, but its getting to be that point in life when no matter how close you have been, friends have to do their own thing and you just can't expect them to drop everything when you roll into town. Also its just not the same I guess when you have to figure out where you'll be staying when you head home. I mean is that really home at that point?

Moms just moved back into our old hood and that isn't sitting right with me. That's all I'll say about that. Just glad this job came when it did so hopefully down the line I will be able to do something about that as well. Right now I am just glad that this job will have me making a significant contribution to my kids again. The least I could do, I mean my friends used to joke with me and try to have my kids call me by first name instead of dad, and this weekend I could sense just how close I was/am coming to that point. I hadnt seen them in over a month and when I saw them- and I guess one day when some of you have kids, you will get this- they looked so grown and old. I seriously felt like I had missed out on their entire lives, even though its really been only about 1 yr of it. a year still is too much. Basically what I'm fighting to avoid is to become that long distance dad that you only know of because he sends money. I gotta figure that out before its too late.  On a cool note though is that this job is gonna keep my streak of taking them to Disneyland every year. I have taken them every year since Danny was born- 11 years. that wasn't gonna happen with the AAA pay. But now, we have already planned to go during the holiday season- The nightmare before Christmas is one of our favorite movies and the haunted mansion at that time of year is the one ride we always make sure to hit up.

So back to home, where is it now? LA. This realization has everything to do with one guy-Wes. There is no combination of words, no exaggerated statement, no majestic prose, that will ever fully explain the gratitude I have. He probably won't like the fact I am bringing this up, but it needed to be written. He made LA my home. Not just by providing a roof and a room, but by making me feel welcome, never showing like I was intruding on his life, making sure I was included in the happenings of LA... He's like Dorothy Mantooth, haha.
Don't get me wrong I love me some SD and I do have a comfort level there I dont have up here, but as of now LA is home  and  so when I'm in Phoenix and say I'll be going home, it'll be to LA. Unless he changes the locks, haha.

As for the job, I still have a long way to go, but when my new boss said "Good luck to all of us-Lets go get rich!", it got me thinking of the possibilities... Heading to Phoenix to rise like the bird of its namesake hopefully... As for a last night out I was thinking of C & Os- heard so much about it I figure that would be a cool spot to go for anyone that wants to bid me farewell to meet up at for dinner and some vino...

Sunday Morning

Sometimes I look at this here site and go damn I wish I had time to write up something. Well due to my new found responsible way of drinking, I called it a night early last night and now I'm up bright and bushy tailed. On a Sunday. Sure Wednesday was a different story and 7 or 8 shots of bourbon later I found myself needing to get up off the couch and shower to go to work, but hey at least I made it. So where was the new found responsible way of drinking that night? Well actually that was the night it was created. Due to recent events-and only those really close in my circle nowadays know about it- I have decided its time. Spoke to Wes about it, and he gave me some encouragement, but I'm sure like mostly everyone else will, he received it with some skepticism. Shit I'll be honest I am skeptical myself, but this time unlike the other times I really want to give it a shot and see how long I can go. " I am skeptical" by the way was my dad's response to anyone who ever asked him to donate money for a cause. Just would calmly walk by them and say "I am skeptical" without so much as stopping. I found this to be a highly amusing asshole type of move. I can never get myself to do it myself, but it is highly entertaining to see someone else do it and see the reaction of the rejected person. It was my dad's birthday this week- its a day before my brothers. just thought I give him a shout out.

anyways back to my working at the auto club; you all know I love auto insurance and servicing it. You all have been around when I off on a tangent about it, your eyes glaze over and you slowly back away and leave me talking by myself. actually that happens on every subject I talk about. Actually not just any subject, pretty much every time I open my mouth as soon as attention can be diverted from me it is. Haha, its cool I'm used to it. this is why I write on this site. you always make the mistake of clicking on the link and feel compelled at that point to read it. Anyways back to what I was trying to get to. My job. Love the industry, pride myself at being able to service it well, hope every insured gets serviced well, but I hate the position I'm in. Not so much the job, or the slave like conditions my current company makes us do our job in, but the fact I am forced to interact socially with a new and complete stranger about every 7 minutes. I do it ok I guess, but like I was telling Carina the other day, I panic as soon as I hang up the phone and have to wait for another insured. Like seriously. Like to the point I want to go to the bathroom and hide. to the point that every morning as I am heading to work I drive by the 405 s on ramp and seriously contemplate taking it and going home. It wasnt until a few years ago I realized I had a huge social anxiety issue. It sometimes gets to the point my heart races so fast I swear I am about to have a heart attack. Its not so bad in a non work social setting but as anyone that hangs out regularly can clearly see-especially when I'm sober, I suck at this aspect in life. I have to have known you for 10 years or feel really really confident that you actually like me as a friend to get through that wall and be comfortable and actually speak clearly all the thoughts that go on in my head. Otherwise its a muddled, convulated, mostly dull, drivel that comes out. This is where the alcohol comes in, there is a certain point in the night where the alcohol level in my body is at an optimum and is perfect for calming me and still allows for clear thoughts. Except I always tend to quickly go past that point, where the thought process becomes diluted and I go back to saying retarded shit. Briefly this part was countered with another social "enhancer". I was saying the other night that when I was on it I would talk non stop and people (especially other girls on the same enhancer) would thoroughly enjoy my company. Well its been over a year since I have partook in that nonsense; I alluded to it the other day on an FB post with Atmosphere's shouda known. Which perfectly explains this current dry spell I am on. So there you go. while alcohol just loosens most people up to bring out their normal social behavior, it has been a required tool for me to pry mine out. If you are thinking to yourself "Roy even when drunk you're still dull," haha fuck you. Anyways just thought I share my struggle at work. This is why I always respect highly anyone that is in a call center environment and does their job well. which goes to the majority of you that work at the AG, and GCO. Which is why Ricky Williams is one of my favorite athletes. and which is why I am awake this god damn early on a sunday- I wanted to make sure I was well rested for my consulting job so that I give myself a real shot at gettin hired full time for the arizona company i am working for. I need the job not only for the money, pride of being able to say " I'm Back!" like Paul Newmann in The color of Money, but also to relieve myself of the daily anxiety attacks that come from my current job. I wish I was exaggerating that but I'm not. The thought of working tomorrow has me currently in a minor panic mode as I type this. My passion for underwriting didnt come from wanting to be the one to make decisions on policies, but from the peace of knowing you don't interact socially with alot of people in that position. There you all that read this know now....

So tonight I will have one last drink at trivia (anyone in the LA area is invited to help team dela ) hopefully for a while, drunkenly stumble to my room and sleep until i wake up and have to go to work.

Oh yeah I wrote a while ago that I would list the inspiration for some of my superbly incredibly average and medicore lyrics...

The whole series of the landlord and tenents was inspired equally by Brother Ali's "Shadows of the Sun" and Prince Paul's "A prince amongst thieves"- just the whole concept of a single project being a story
The one about Pops- Atmosphere's Yesterday
The one about my kids- Brother Ali's Faheem, Atmos' Little Man
The second verse of verses from my abstract- Elzhi's "Demons"
Limeade- Earl Sweatshirt (of ODD FUTURE)'s orange juice, LEGACY's I'm nothing
Gym torture- Sean Price's Suicide Doors
magic johnson- Atmosphere's Fashion Magazine./ J-live's MC

Enjoy your sunday. I'm off to shower and prep for my meeting

Blackstar - Respiration

Other than the fact she cancelled at the last second, I would say my first online date went well haha. I was tired from my hike and run in with the rattle snake anyways and at least I got to get home in time to get a full nights rest  before the morning's basketball game and saved some money for tomorrow's trivia action.

Hennesey's tavern was a nice spot to take in all the scenery however, which includes some of the wait staff. I  decided to be super responsible and make it a sober saturday, Those are a roy rarity- like Haley's comet. So I just thought I would mark it for you all to know it may not happen again in your lifetime... Wrote some shit to mark the 13yr anniversay of the song brothers by D and me, haha maybe this will also make it onto a cd....

Anyways, if you feel youre smart and can contribute feel free to cruise with. I'm off to calm kobe down from all the commotion happening on the street tonight and get some shut eye.

Respiration- came on in the car and thought I share.

A little Q and A with your Favorite Blogger.

 I decided that you all here might be too shy to ask me anything for fear that I would ignore your questions, so I decided to come up with some questions that I thought you all were dying to ask me but hadn't gotten the nerve to. Or it could be that I am extremely fucking bored while waiting for someone to get home so that we can continue our quest to rid america of zombies...

So which Roy De La Cruz are you? When I google your name to read up on your awesome life I get multiple hits including another roy de la cruz that blogs...


You can't really google me, so I'm assuming you're talking about the Filipino Roy De La Cruz who is actually a serious blogger and has multiple blogs going on at once. I dont take it that seriously. Coincidentally enough, he also pens lyrics from time to time though. Sadly though I also am not the Roy De La Cruz who was a college point guard. I have however in the past lied to ladies at bars and when they didnt believe me I have just told them to google it. he is 6'1" and my height is close enough...

Speaking of basketball, why do you bore us with your stat lines of your league games?
I'm really just trying to coax you into you thinking you're better than me and then challenging me to a game. Its a hustler like move so that when you do, I'll take your money and your pride.

Why is your room a mess?
Its not that its a mess- I just don't bother making my bed unless people are coming over-really its a waste of time i mean its just gonna get unmade the next night anyways... Other than that its really just the laundry I have done that I never get around to putting away. Dont get me wrong I love doing me some laundry- folding it even. But putting away the shit sucks. Same deal with washing dishes. I don't mind doing them but putting them away- I refuse. If you're ever at Wes' and notice the high rise of dishes in the dish rack, that was my precise placing of the dishes so that I don't have to put them away in the cupboards.

Did you know you're wearing two different color socks?
I'll be damned. Both look black to me.

Do you own any tee shirt that isnt a  hip hop group?
Of course! my Vlade Divac shirt to name one.

Speaking of Hip Hop why do you write lyrics?
because every rap fan is a wanna be rapper.

Some of your lines are alright even down right legendary- but why the fuck are they off beat/ non metered?
In my head they are on beat because I know what song I'm writing them to, from Suicide Doors by Sean Price, to DJ Premier, to 9th wonder beats. But really as long as you get the point from the lines, I don't care that they arent, its just that I havent read the book how to rap yet and dont really plan on making a career switch at this point in my life so...

Why are some so medicore?
because I dont sit here and write, re write, and continue to rewrite them. they are one and done from my head to the pen and thats it. The world wouldnt be able to handle it if I actually was motivated enough to finish something (see, putting away laundry, dishes...)

Who do you blatantly rip off for your concepts to those lyrics?
I take it you're not a golfer. Pretty much the groups I listen to, if you havent bothered listening to the songs I post up here, then you obviously wouldnt know. Like for instance, the whole series of the landlord and tenets was really taken from Brother Ali's Shadows of the Sun song. Read the lyrics and you'll see I borrowed a couple of lines, but other than that the rest I try to be as original with them as I can. One day I'll post a listing of what song inspired/was plagiarized to come up with the lyrics that have been posted on here- every one. I promise, but Wes just came in and its time to save america. so I'll do that another time

That landlord v tenets, were they written about specific people?
 Only one- Apartment C- and no it wasnt about me. I have a friend I have known since 5th grade who is going through a rough time. The rest may have been inspired from events during the time I wrote them, but they werent specific to people and some have obvious tones of my life but dont necessarily reflect it completely. fine fine I'll jot down a list of whoever inspired each song later but don't feel like doing it now.Obviously the one about the dog is about Kobe.

How is this interview going?


honestly I was gonna ask myself harder questions but forgot what they were cuz I am hungry.

you know people will think you are either crazy or full of yourself for having interviewed yourself, right?
yeah I'm a nerd, freak, schizophrenic like that. but thats why the 20 people that read this in the usa read this. I can only guess the people from europe and asia read this to practice their english...

Most Beautifullest Thing In This World

Its Father's day- A happy one to all my friends who are dads- Danny, Hugo, Bill, Jason, Stacey, Jake, Joel, Saadiq, Derrick, and to my uncle. To all my childless, barren, deprived of the joy of leaving a legacy, have a happy sunday too. Kids really are the most beautifullest things in the world and you too will one day feel that. I received a father's day card from my kids on Thursday which was a nice break from the other pieces of mail I have been receiving lately-haha, damn set backs. Anyways this is the first one I wont be having with my kids- I worked yesterday and wasnt able to make it down there this weekend. Its cool though because I will be down there next weekend. Chilis La Mesa is calling my name afterall... Today I think I will either get in a quick hike or run by the beach and then hit up my basketball game around 5. I myself have been playing some horrible ball- the other night I blew 4 easy put ins and even though I was fouled on all of them, I should have made them. my shot is also off although during warms up I hit everything. need to find a way to do that in games. The rebounding is still there obviously cuz I'm too awesome not to grab every board.... But then after that I guess just lounge at the ludus.

Beginning this week, I am gonna start hitting up the gym full time again- Ive been slacking- in preparation for Havasupai. Issam is making it out to be the most exhausting, terrifying hike ever, what with rodents, helicopter rescues, heat strokes, falling rocks, having to out play the devil on your favorite instrument, having to solve a riddle from the troll at the bridge, and needing to have whip skills like indiana jones in order to get to the campsite. Me? I'm not worried. The only thing I'm missing from my arsenal are them pants that convert into shorts with zippers. But still a little boot camp training me style will only make the hike go a little more smoother...

The type of job I have right now requires that you have people around your cubicle that make the day go by faster. Saadiq and Ivan are these types of cats. The other day I realized Saadiq and me were arguing over Hockey. Please note that this is a Mexican and Black guy arguing over HOCKEY.
" The throwing of octopus onto the ice is really only a Detroit thing dude"
______________________________________________________________
" I've been looking at this dude's billing and I'm about to hit him with the dreaded 'I don't know' hahahahahaha"
" Oh man haha not that! you cant make something up? Weave a confusing tale of the autoclub billing practices that confuses him to the point of giving up and just paying what the bill says?"
" hahaha tried that already and this man is no fool.- hold up"
Saadiq returns to his phone call and confused policyholder
" Thanks for holding sir, I looked at your billing and I gotta be honest- I DONT KNOW... yes sir what you  youre welcome I will look into this further and call you back. I promise."
Me to Saadiq
" Its alright Saadiq you did the best you could, you did the best you could. Shake that off, shake that off! there will be a tomorrow!"
_________________
" I'm coming up with a top ten list of ice cube hits that werent singles."
" 'My Summer Vacation?'"
"hahha you know it- what you know about 'My Summer Vacation'!"- Saadiq's response to every hip hop rap group or song I know that he doesnt think I should know.
 Man I rocked some Ice Cube before he turned soft and went all hollywood. actually lethal injection. that was the last thing i ever purchased from him... Too Short, BDP, NWA, Geto Boys- man that was my childhood-then I heard bonita applebum, check the rhyme, the choice is yours, and my west coast love went on hiatus...

" What you know about the Low End Theory?"
"haha I know regardless what music you listen to from punk to rap to classical, to mexican ranchero music, you better have that in your top ten albums of all time."


Keith Murray- The Most Beautifullest thing in this world. I'm off to start this Sunday.

Dog day afternoon

He hangs out on the porch and across the street
From that ugly ass building but still wonders if they have meat
Cuz his owner is a vegan and all he gets is oat treats
That ain't enough to battle his worst enemy
That man in blue strolling with them papers
Always with bad news that man is a hater
But his barks have no bite behind that door
A daily defeat when them papers hit the floor
It's just them two the owner and him
So when friends are over he gets blamed for the fartin'
But thats cool he don't mind it
Plus his owner is the one who has to pick up his shit
Yeah that's right he has a privileged life
Good food, filtered water, and he gets to sleep inside
Though he hates the long walks, and when he gets dressed
And when the girl comes over he gets kicked out the bed
But other than that no major bones
So is the life of the one kobe Jones

The graduate

When disaster strikes, describes this scene
There's take out, trash, liquor- not one spot clean
Passed out, boxers only on his floor
Couldn't quite figure out his bedroom door
Finals were on Thursday and he had to celebrate
Aced his shit and he's gonna graduate
So he went on a bender
And ten years later whose gonna remember
That he grabbed her ass and got slapped by the bartender
Proceeded to get cut off on his 16th beer
Oh well he's the future of America let's make that clear
That plane you fly in, he'll be the engineer
So it was her loss
One day soon he'll make more than her boss
And that's all he really tried to explain
That she should jump ship and board his train
His red face proof of the rejection
So it was time to stumble back to the apartment
Wasted yet again his neighbors can tell
As he pulls it put to piss below his stairwell
And they hope he gets over this
Cuz one day he might run this government...

Speed

Yesterday's post was a result of this conversation....

So yesterday, Ivan asked me if I was gonna hit up a dodger game this weekend cuz the padres are play them. I replied that I was thinking about it because I have never been to dodger stadium. Ivan sits across from my buddy Saadiq. Saadiq upon hearing this lets me know that my LA cool status has dropped or some shit because I havent ever been- I reply with he has no SD coolness cuz he's never been to Petco Park...

" I go to stadiums that have championships brother..."

oof! blow to the stomach; I grimace in having to acknowledge this fact.

Saadiq does not stop there;

" I had some respect for the Padres in my youth until they started trading away everyone- hahaha what they get for Fred McGriff again? some baseballs? some helmets? cuz I know they didn't get no players"

I could only reply-

" I hope they got a washing machine and some stirrups..."

" And what about your Chargers?"

I try to cut him off-

"Dont even be bringing up Leaf-"

The man knows a little something about sports

"Saadiq you're cutting to the core of me- this is stinging more than my divorce. you're bringing up painful memories of my youth..."

Saadiq, Ivan start laughing, I join in as I realize none of us have taken a phone call in quite some time, which is you know like our jobs... Hence the hasty post at lunch yesterday... I'm off to hike the away the pain that is still lingering...

Speed probably again from little brother dunno know probably posted it before...

The pain

Watch "Murs - The Pain" on YouTube

The following are by far the most painful times in my life

June 1991; NBA finals Lakers verses Chicago. The series started so beautifully with big Sam Perkins hitting a last second 3 to win game one. Vlade magic and them were well on the way. But then they lost 4 in a row- three at home and it was finally clear who the greatest basketball player of all time would be. To add insult to injury I had bet my teacher on the lakers winning and ended up having to wash his lame ass Porsche in front of the whole school... this is why I want Chicago to win the east this year- so that the lakers can avenge my crying and embarrassment from twenty years ago. With bynum playing like a man this should be easily accomplished

January 1994- the chargers have just shocked the world by beating Pittsburgh in Pittsburgh to advance to the superbowl. Only to get there asses handed to them in the superbowl. The worst part is that I couldn't even watch it because I had to work at kmart and got yelled at every time I stayed too long in the tv section... to date the chargers have not returned to the promised land. I can only hope this is the year....

October 1998- the padres are shocking the world by dismantling the best Yankee team ever. Gywnn and Vaughn have both homered to give them a comfortable lead. They rocked David wells. Then the inning happened mark langston gets squeezed by the ump against Paul O'neill on a pitch that to this day is a strike and the Yankees come back to win. I truly believe if the padres win that first game, they would have won it all, they had another game locked up as well but a certain closer blew the save. Tony gwynn was the only padre to hit like a man that series he hit a cool .500.

To this day no championship other than indoor soccer has come to san Diego and for all intents and purposes my life is half over. I don't want to end up like a lame ass cubs fan who lived and died never knowing the feeling of seeing a championship.

do my tears surprise you? Yes strong men also cry, strong men also cry...

my notes

These last couple of weeks have been simply great. Don't know what I did to deserve it- maybe I don't but like William Money said, " deserves got nothing to do with it" from excellents sunday fundays in LA and San Diego, learning of a pay raise, being able to post for a promotion less than a month out of training (lets hope I get it-thats a different story), to seeing my kids in SD and now getting to have them for a real extended period of time up here in LA. Even moms is paying a visit. Not to mention a new atmosphere album that is growing on me, and a concert in the next week. Shit is just looking rosy right now. Maybe its just a shift in focus and thought about being in LA and at this new job stemming from my hike a couple of weeks ago, maybe its just pure luck. Fuck maybe its just that summer is around the corner. Tell you what, there is no better feeling than your beautiful daughter curling up next to you. congrats to Hugo and Kelly for their upcoming baby boy. While life isnt completely good, its getting there and thats all I have been waiting for I guess- a sign that this is turning around. It is.

I have the final three concepts of my little project in my head I'll get them on here once my wrist improves-really the only bs happening right now. anyways had to share this good frame of mind,

My Notes, by you know who.

unit C

Paranoid thoughts enter his mental
every 5 minutes he's looking out his peep hole
and he's been at this for days
ever since she left and its been just him up in the place
actin like he don't care plus he has the money to waste
missin work not answerin his phone
when he's on it he just wants to be alone
his life in shambles
calls his friends on some charlie sheen rambles
nothin they can do when they are just holdin the phone
except repeat shit he already knows
"you gotta keep control"
" 3 ozs in a week nah thats not that cool"
"come on don't be this fool"
"nothing is worth doing this to yourself"
"stop for your kids if not for your health"
scared to what must be going through his head
what must be going on in that apartment
prayin that the landlord don't find him dead
and this is when he realizes he really needs help
phone's been dead for days
his blown ass had been talkin to himself...

Back Rent

he tiptoes passed unit #1 thats the landlord's and he dont want none
cuz his last check played like a basketball
as he glides pass he stops to ponder the new tag on the wall
"Life's a bitch so be the pimp"
smiles cuz he gets it
still he's so out of his element
away from those who filled him with joy and laughs
that was the plan-reside in this studio to become a better man
but he needed therapy so last months rent went to the bar
keeps that up living in a car wont be far
lucky he gets another month to right his wrongs
the key still opens his door the roof's still over his head
so he thinks to his future ahead
and knows soon he'll be outta of the red
life's a bitch so be the pimp
and he's gonna make that bitch turn in one more trick...

The Tenets/move in day

Move In Day


The Landlord called; the place was hers
she smiled no more roommates to disturb
keys in her  hands relax the nerves
the areas not great, the parking sucks
theres no AC, no laundry but so what
she's finally made it out on her own
nuthin like an apartment to feel all grown
gets to decorate in her taste
no cable yet but the tv is on what she wanna see
chill out to her favorite dvds
make her own dinner
gets to puff on her reefer
sunday funday or it could be lazy
with no one around that be judging
and thats how she sees it
rent she pays well worth the freedom

Clones

So how else do you respond to a knife taped to your bedroom door besides pure laughter? Should 30 yrs olds (fine fine 33 year olds) be having this much fun? fuck yes. Plus seriously nothing like a knife taped on your door in the middle of the night to take the dread off Mondays... D Wes and Me also had some wholesome family fun yesterday when we were playing catch and throwing back a few. Haha it was Field of Dreamsesque


I clearly lead the East LA league in rebounding. Its a shame I am also clearly last in field goal percentage right now too. Charles Barkley "Tuurrble" Sunday was maybe the worst game I have played. I dont know sometimes I get so anxious I refuse to play my game and just pass the ball off although I know I am probably the second best scorer on the team. I think I concentrate too much on the missed shots and missed rebounds and that gets me down. This one was weird cuz I started off nailing a three from the corner. Oh well shit is still fun...One of the guys on my team commented after the game that I seemed out of it... Haha maybe it was all the alcohol this weekend.  I also am beginning to realize why the team I am on is one of the most hated in the league. I'll just point out this example- yesterday with under a minute left and us down by 20 (yes it was bad) guys on the team fouled the other team on purpose to stop the clock. Really team? Haha I started looking for the spot on the floor you could make it from that would count as a 100 pointer- like back in the day when MTV would have those basketball contests between athletes and musicians.

The Birthday week was excellent- Started out on my actual Birthday when I got to go to the Laker Game- Actually walked from my work to the Staples Center- Hit up the game with With a C and With a K.Triple OT wins on the birthday are really nice. A real special thanks to With a C- like I told her, when I first got hired by the AAA, I had seen the Lakers would actually be playing at home on my birthday and thought I would be able to gift tickets to myself. But the pay and other circumstances had me deciding not to do it so it was especially cool that the tickets were scored. Friday, buddies from AZ came into town with a special Norwegian guest-man that guy was a character. Friday Hermosa Beach felt the wrath as did the Bigfoot. Saturday was a really cool birthday party- Thanks to everyone again for making it out and to Puya for the Pinata- Really it was one of the better ones- not counting my little kid bdays, I would have to say this one was in the top 3. funny last year on my birthday it was just Nick, Brian, and me hanging out at an Oggis- so this one more than made up for last year's lack of festivities.

quick tips- one Sasquatch is bad enough in one night. Two in ten minutes? You'll end up getting tossed out of a bed by an angry Arab. Oh and don't be bringing up "facts" when I am in the process of telling a drunken tale that is obviously told with a spin to highlight the victimization that was of me, such as;
"he actually dropped it in the bathroom"
"he also threw it at Issam..."
these "facts" are irrelevant when it comes to the point of the story- I was clearly a victim that was forced to pay an unjust deductible, haha.

Phone update! Wes found a screen for half the deductible and so the deductible is a moot point. I can either return the replacement phone, sell it on Ebay for a profit, or give it to Wes so he can upgrade from his inferior Iphone.

Clones by the Roots. 1994 was an excellent rap year.

Eviction Notice

She was just a little girl
just here a few years unversed in the realities of the world
all she knew is that she had to move
anything that didnt fit in her bag she was gonna lose
but still, she kept the good thoughts
like sunday mornings when her pops would put on the hip hop
and make her breakfast
bananas pancakes was his best dish
a whole day of just him and her
cuz the rest of the week he just worked so hard
too tired and too late in the day for him to go play in the yard
too young to notice the breath he got from the bar
thats why sundays in that apt were so special
so she made a point to wait till then to put on her best shirt
pops always had a funny face funny story to make it a ball
and after breakfast he would always play dolls

but then the smile fell off daddy's face
trips to disneyland were misplaced
and he no longer cooked them delicious pancakes
his love replaced with anger
she would come home from school to strange letters posted to the door
and daddy stopped answering the phone
boxes started occupying her home
the man with the cigar would show up at the door
talking about how they couldnt stay there no more
and her life after that really made her cold
stopped doing what she was told
when she noticed how the man with the cigar was the one in control
and that's how she learned
see she's now my landlord and she once went through it before
so she could a fuck about your story 
if her apts you can no longer afford

Dreams

Dreams can be a funny thing. They can inspire, motivate, long for something to happen, or bring about your biggest fears. Or they can just be ridiculous hilarious randomness. I had a dream last night I was hangin with Sean Connery. He was a typical bad ass. He left me in his house with a fanny pack to watch over. It was filled with amc movie gift cards and tons of cash. So what did I do? I pocketed one amc gift card for myself, and disregarded the cash. Why? who knows. What I find most hilarious though is when one guy tells another guy;
"I had a dream about you"
that just leaves the door open for too many jokes.
a friend today texted me that today. My response?
"I hope it involved a lot of gratuitous sex"
"hahahaha"
" I also hope in your dream my member was bigger than it is in reality..."
"hahahahahahaahaha"
it turned out it involved me grilling up some meat, then making everyone who was there drink a lot of alcohol and making everyone pass out. Once we woke up all the meat had burned...


The city of Los Angeles sent me a free 5 day transit pass since I have updated my address to LA. I plan on using it for a week and take the bus to work. The bus stop next to Wes' will take me basically all the way to work and leave me only a short walk to get to the AAA. I figure why not- I love people watching and it should provide for an interesting week of riding the bus with fellow angelinos. Besides saving on gas for the week- youve seen gas prices lately?- it will be a break from the monotony and boredom of life. It'll be a new experience and who isn't willing to try changing up their life once in a while?

D and me ran into the greatest fast food worker in LA- which pretty much puts her in the running for greatest fast food employee in the world. She was so cheery and happy to be there, smiling, approving of your order and telling everyone how good their meal selection was. She was also out in the dining room asking everyone how their meal was, helping people find seating, and ending all her sentences with "delicious" And she wasn't a manager- just a regular worker. She took pride in her job, disregarding the fact it was at a carl's jr. Sometimes people I know will judge someone for the job they have and in the end its not totally fair. Just imagine if everyone took as much pride in their job as she did- and she was just a fast food worker...

At Carl Jr's. I partook in celebrating Mardi Gras. I had a regular non diet Dr. Pepper. I cant remember the last time I have a non diet soda- something I am proud of actually. Also instead of heading out after work, Wes and I took off for a 2 hour session at the gym. Trying to make it to the 220s for my 33rd...

The AAA had a graduation for us at work today complete with the pomp and circumstance song, graduation certificates, cake, and awards. I had no clue they were gonna go ahead and give me the award for the top trainee in class, and while it wasn't exactly finishing at the top of the class at an Ivy school, it was nice to know that my experience was seen and recognized. I spent a lot of the time helping out the people seated around me- to the point I wasnt on the phones as much so I could help them out. That really helped out in making it through the day, being able to use some of the experience I have acquired through ten years in this business...

Today this girl kept me on the phone for like half an hour- asking me all sorts of questions that were really basic and that I now realized she already knew the answers to. She then went on about San Diego once she found out I was from there. She then ended the conversation with this;
"Is this call being recorded for security purposes?"
I replied, "I think more so for training purposes"
"Well I probably shouldn't say this... but its a compliment... you have a great voice- very dreamy and soothing..."
I laugh, "um thanks, I'm sure its just cuz its such a clear connection"
It was then I realized why she had kept me on the phone for so long.
she laughed, thanked me and told me she would let me talk to other people now...
Ha I don't think that's exactly true of my voice- she should hear it after I've had a couple of drinks...

Tomorrow I start my new schedule; 11:15- 8 pm. so all of you with normal schedules, especially those still at the anchor shouldn't complain so much haha...

I think I have posted this song before on here, but oh well its too late in the night for me to want to go check my previous blogs to check. Dreams by Little Brother. Have sweet ones if you're still awake for some reason like me...

Repairs?

Don't care if the fridge is broken
no detector so your better smell the smokin
hope you gotta a blanket to use as a curtain
so what if the washer and dryer aint workin
no its not a ghost in
cuz some of your things I'll take them as a tip
for letting you stay up in this bitch
and one thing's for certain
if I come into your apt it'll be for relaxin
cuz your plasma tv is bigger than mine
after a day of evicting I need some on demand to unwind
so I'll watch a flick and put it on your dime
and I don't care that you're kids are gettin tall
so you better not be charting their growth on my walls
I aint got the time to be checking the ac or the heat
just be lucky you aint Tyrone and sleeping on the street

Starbucks in ladera heights.

So a white guy comes into the starbucks- Which even at this location is not uncommon. Except this guy has tattoos up and down his arms,is wearing a Beenie, shades, and has two kids who are wearing premier league soccer jerseys. Immediately the black gentleman on the phone next to me tells who ever is on the only line;
"David Beckham just walked in to the Starbucks with his kids..."
I do a double take just to make sure, smile at the realization that the guy on the phone is wrong and continue waiting for my venti caramel macchiato- yeah thats my Starbucks order on the daily. Anyways the guy turns to me for affirmation, and I just reply that while it look like him I don't think Beckham has all those tattoos.
"But the kids are wearing them soccer jersey from that team in Europe..."
"I just don't think its him..."
And the guy continues with his conversation. I wanted to joke and respond with "what you think all white folk look the same?"  but thought twice about it...
Later on D and me were theorizing what if Beckham knowing that in the AA community he may not be recognized, made trips to inglewood for his Starbucks... Hahaha
Oh and today an older lady with her dog asked me if kobe was my dog. I was obviously honest in this instance... wouldn't want to be liable if kobe had attacked her dog you know? Haha
I'm off to he'd back to the ludus with kobe- this one here was a Mobil post. Just trying to show off the phone...

Put it on

Walking Kobe is like borrowing a friend's Ferrari. It attracts all kinds of talent to you although its not really you they are interested in. I got the pleasure of walking Kobe this week as Wes was boarding it up in Tahoe. The Dude (Kobe) is a ladies magnet. Many other of Wes' friends have seen this first hand. Wednesday morning I'm walking to the Starbucks on la Tijera in the Ladera center when a pretty girl comes up to kobe and me, smiles and exclaims
" How Cute!"
I, knowing full well she's not talking about me but the dog, reply;
" Aw thanks!-I can't remember the last time some one called me cute- I think it was 3rd grade..."
she laughs and replies that she was talking about the dog and I in turn reply
" what are you implying- that I'm not cute?" and before she replies I just laugh and confirm to her know I was joking. We then start some small talk about whether I live in the area, does she, and blah blah blah. She ask for Kobe's name and I tell her. she then asks me if I always walk MY dog around these parts.
This is where Kobe resembles that borrowed Ferrari. He's not my dog, but cluing this girl on that little fact might ruin this opportunity. So its either tell the truth and kill it, Lie completely and possibility start off something completely wrong with a lie, or...
" My roommate is usually the one that walks him although I may start walking him more since my schedule has been adjusted at work- how about you do you walk a dog around these parts?"

See now I haven't lied I just did not correct her wrong assumption- and honestly it would be kind of rude to correct someone you just met right? Wes is my roommate and my schedule did change. This is all true. Of course if she would have continued to inquire I would have said the truth but she didnt and thats that.

This morning on the way back from Starbucks Kobe starts getting all playful and is jumping on me, biting on his leash and stopping to stare at me, while we're walking. As we are approaching the stoplight on Alvern and La Tijera, I see this girl begin to roll down her window and looking at us while she is waiting for the light to turn green. She then yells out to us " cute!" as we are waiting to cross. I  respond
"which one of us?" she laughs and responds
"well both of you actually" and I laugh as her light turns green and she waves goodbye...

Put it on by Big L- did you guys know he actually made a cameo in Masta Ace's Sitting on Chrome video? that question was posed to the people who know who big L and Masta Ace are. By the way you all may never have heard of Eminem if it hadnt been for Masta Ace- which is why the double M thanked Masta Ace when he won one of his first grammys. just some fun facts for you all.